Hello, I’m Debbie, Dan’s mum.

This blog is my way of coping with Dan’s sudden death in a road accident in 2018. I deal with grief and sadness and sometimes a little hope.

I’ve written a memoir, Middowed, and I’m looking for a bold agent to take it on and help me take mine and Dan’s story out into the world. It follows my path of loss in the 12 months after Dan died and weaves in and out of Dan’s story from birth to fifteen.

Thank you for visiting. I hope you choose to come back!

The Ghosts of Christmases Past, Present, and Future.

‘Merry Christmas, Nanny!’ Dan flung open the back door and strode into the kitchen, stamping his feet on the mat to shake off the snow from his black Converse hi-tops.  ‘Ooh, you silly sod you nearly made me drop the spuds.’ My mum, in her festive red dress and white cardy, tipped a pan of…

Everything reminds me of you

In the newly decorated and reorganised home office, I hear a beep beep from one of the boxes. ‘Oh my god Dan, your watch is still beeping for some random alarm you set.’ And, in a blink, you are next to me, laughing too. ‘Hur-hur-hur, Can’t believe it, it’s how old? I think I got…

No More Nails

There are handmade boxes of drill bits; masonry, wood, metal. Small cardboard boxes of screws in varying lengths. Large toolboxes with pliers and spanners and hammers. The garage is a trove for the D-I-Y hobbyist. It’s now my job to sort it out and find new homes for all these items. Dad was always building…

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About Me

I’m Debbie. I’m a fifty-something Middow* and Disabled Students’ Allowance Assessor** and a blogger***

*Middow is a coined term for a mother who has lost her only child

**Disabled Students’ Allowance Assessor is someone who helps HE disabled students get government-funded support.

***trainee/incompetent blogger to be exact.

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